Hail Mary Haiku: Tennessee Volunteers - Georgia Bulldogs edition

by Joel on Oct 6, 2008 7:01 AM EDT in Tennessee Volunteer Football Comment 31 comments

Time for the Tennessee-Georgia Hail Mary Haiku.

Here's the concept for those new to the game: You're behind by four at midfield. Only one second remains on the clock, and you have to heave the ball into a mass of players in the end zone and hope that one of your guys comes down with it. Bonus points for actually observing the traditional 5-7-5 format for haikus, but free form haikus are allowed. This is, after all, a desperation play.

I'll try to post the entries and open up the voting on Thursday morning. Voting will continue until Game Day, when I'll post the winner. The winner gets . . . a point in the RTT Guessing Game Challenge.

Enter yours by clicking on the "Comments" link below, and pass the invitation to enter along to others. Keep 'em clean, please.

Hike! Ooooh!

0 recs | Comment 31 comments |

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

birdjam's post-haiku contest victory letdown

Let us all hope that
Vols maintain their winning ways
Unlike my haikus

Lou Brock loves Lamp.

by birdjam on Oct 6, 2008 8:56 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Stephens wins the start,
hope offense picks them apart,
doesn’t smell like a….

"Florida didnt win their first SEC title until 1991 and now they think they invented football."
-Ron Zook

by rustytanton on Oct 6, 2008 9:45 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Jim Bob Cooter is not alone

Watch that ford focus!
Colquitt hits bottle also.
Foiled by tree stump.

This one was just really funny to me

by InBruceWeTrust on Oct 6, 2008 11:18 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

They call that a

DUI-Ku

by Getoffmyvols on Oct 6, 2008 8:13 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

I'll ask it again later...

Oh Magic 8-Ball,
Will Vols beat Dawgs Saturday?
“Outlook not so good.”

by ChattVol on Oct 6, 2008 11:46 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

WINNAR!

by Aerobab on Oct 6, 2008 9:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Poetic Optimism

The Vols aren’t real hot
But Georgia’s number we got
Vols: please score a lot

by kidbourbon on Oct 6, 2008 11:50 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Please, oh please St. Nick,
May we see the Clawfense now?
Georgia on my mind.

by hooper on Oct 6, 2008 11:51 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Rapping, Big Orange Style

Oh me oh my oh
People call me crazy cuz
I still have Vol pride

*Channel your inner Vanilla Ice minus the ninja turtles

Might as well have fun

At least we still have Eric Berry

by Volorado on Oct 6, 2008 12:02 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Go Smokey, Go Smokey, Go

"Florida didnt win their first SEC title until 1991 and now they think they invented football."
-Ron Zook

by rustytanton on Oct 6, 2008 12:11 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Yo, CPF! Let's kick it! Word to your Mutha

by ChattVol on Oct 6, 2008 12:16 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Desperate, backs against the wall
The task ahead is none to small
Cutcliff is gone offense n’ all
The dawgs will have a joyous ball
A shame Munson won’t call
At games end, dawgs will stand tall

Goooooo DAWGS!!!!

by deanpat92 on Oct 6, 2008 1:22 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

An ode to UGA

U. G. A. L. Y.
UGA’s got no alibi!
Ugly! Sooooo Ugly!

Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car.

by MeytonPanning on Oct 6, 2008 2:01 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Original

Make that up yourself did’cha? If I didn’t know better I’d think this was a rip off of the cheer made popular by the movie “Wildcats”, which came out in 1986 and starred Goldie Hawn, Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson. But Vol fans have much more originality than that, Right?

by deanpat92 on Oct 6, 2008 3:21 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Oh.

You mean like following haiku format?

by hooper on Oct 6, 2008 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Now, be nice...

Haiku is a graduate-level course at UGA.

Lou Brock loves Lamp.

by birdjam on Oct 6, 2008 5:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

HAIKU!!!

[bless you]

by hooper on Oct 6, 2008 5:50 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Sorry deanpat. But i was 5 when this so called movie came out. My inspiration came from every cheerleader I ever met.

But if its originality you crave I got you covered.

If Alabama
Was any indication
we might have a chance!

Thank you! Come Again!

Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car.

by MeytonPanning on Oct 6, 2008 4:39 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

suhweeet

whoshotwhointhewhatnow?

by thetennesseethumper on Oct 6, 2008 9:40 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

UT in NFL

Jamal coke dealer
Henry never wears rubber
Albert-Ouch! My Face!

by UgaMatt on Oct 6, 2008 4:25 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

UGA haiku

Where is David Greene?
Earning the league minimum,
washing first string’s socks.

"Florida didnt win their first SEC title until 1991 and now they think they invented football."
-Ron Zook

by rustytanton on Oct 6, 2008 5:54 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Better

That’s better MP but seriuosly…. Do I even need to mention UCLA, UF or AU. Come on man?

What’s with the David Greene bashing? That’s all you got. Y’all have kicked our a$$e$ the last two years and the best you got is a joke about David Greene? If you’re still upset he broke Payton’s record as the winningest QB in D1 history then you got issues. Let it go.

Don’t you just love trash talking? This is what makes college football the best sport in the world.

by deanpat92 on Oct 6, 2008 7:47 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Slim pickins for Vols high points this year

So I default to bashing David Greene. He’s also:

Why I can’t shake this cold
Why my cell phone keeps dropping calls
Why my girlfriend’s car got a random crack in its windshield
Why the hall in my apartment building smells like burned fish and dog poop
Why the government had to bail out Wall Street

He is the root of all evil sir.

"Florida didnt win their first SEC title until 1991 and now they think they invented football."
-Ron Zook

by rustytanton on Oct 6, 2008 10:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Well...

… that may be, but David Pollack thinks he’s just dreamy.

Lou Brock loves Lamp.

by birdjam on Oct 7, 2008 9:56 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Fifty one to thir-
ty three, thirty five to four-
teen, Take that Mark Richt

by Getoffmyvols on Oct 6, 2008 8:10 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Bulldogs Hobnailed now:
Stafford strains back lifting keg
D-Line makes him pay

"I' m not from England but my money still comes in pounds"

by G.M.U. Vol on Oct 6, 2008 9:26 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Now that's funny

That’s what I’m talkin’ about. Nicely done sir.

by deanpat92 on Oct 6, 2008 9:31 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

i live in Georgia
dawgs silent on Saturdays
beautiful autumn

whoshotwhointhewhatnow?

by thetennesseethumper on Oct 6, 2008 9:49 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Nick can audible:
fifty-one, thirty-three, Dawg,
thirty-five, fourteen!

by bobo_the_vol on Oct 7, 2008 1:09 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Same record as 'Big Brother' hahaha

I’ma do this here
haiku in pterodactyl
Veek Veek Veek Veek, son

by MightyMightyMitzu on Oct 8, 2008 3:38 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

If there was a Nobel Prize for Hail Mary Haikus, I’d give Birdjam one for his NIU entry, and give you one for figuring out how to get haiku and pterodactyl in the same line. Bravo.

Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car.

by MeytonPanning on Oct 8, 2008 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs