On a cold January morning, roughly 10 months ago, the rumor mill started spinning that the University of Tennessee had landed on a coach after the short-lived, mad-scramble that the last guy caused. To put it bluntly, certain life long Vol fans (including yours truly) were looking for a tall building with an easily accessible rooftop after one Derek Dooley, formally of Louisiana Tech, had been announced as our head football coach.

This was not a slight against Dooley himself, and we still have a long way to go to determine if he is capable of taking this program back into "National Powerhouse" status. This was, more or less, frustration at how far our program had fallen, and how we had to live with the following fact: the best we could do was a coach from a small school with a losing record.

However, it didn't take long for Dooley to work his way into our Orange hearts. Indeed, he had me at "Time to dust off your britches." Our first season with Dooley has had a few ups and a lot of downs, but there are four things we can now rely on: Death, Taxes, Perfect Hair, and Hilarious Quotes.

This post (and subsequent thread) is dedicated to the fourth thing on the list. I'll put a few of my favorite quotes below, but please, RTT gang,  pitch in with any glaring oversights I may have missed, or any future Dooley gems.

Dooley on THE HAIR: (June 2, 2010)

You know, it's amazing. Some people are worried about what offense we're gonna run, other people's worrying about how multiple we are on defense. You guys are worried about my hair. . . . I will say this: I've had the same haircut since I was 12 years old. Okay, so do the math. That's 30 years of the exact same haircut. At some point your hair finally concedes and says, "I'm gonna just do what the heck you want me to do, and I'm not gonna fight it anymore." And so everybody has their hair fighting them all the time because they don't train it and do it consistently over time, all right? It's no different than training a team. You do it over, and you do it over, and you do it over, and you don't deviate from the plan, and you bring it across and you shape it down, and then eventually they do it how you want it. And then once my hair said, "Okay, I'll do it how you want it," I haven't changed. Why change?

Dooley on THE 2010 VOLS: May 7, 2010

We've got five new offensive linemen, a new quarterback and a brand new running back. Other than that, we're in great shape.

Dooley on HYGIENE: (September 9, 2010)

We had, I told them, the worst shower discipline of any team I've ever been around. So we talked a little bit about application of soap to the rag and making sure you hit all your body. You know, you can neglect it trying to cut corners, and it shows in how you practice and elsewhere. I'm hoping we show some improvement in that.

Dooley on CALLING IN SICK:  (October 27, 2010)

Are you kidding me?  You shouldn't be sick on a Monday. Nobody gets sick on a Monday. You're not sick.