Morning Talking Points, 'Thank God, the World Has Meaning Again' edition:

Yes, ladies and gentleman, you heard it here first: the football starts today! That means no more:

• having to see stupid baseball on TV! Hurray!
• pointlessly throwing your Saturdays away 'spending time' with 'loved ones!' Huzzah! 
• getting drunk enough to pretend you understand that weird, cruelly-named children's game people in other countries play! Goooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!

Today's Headlines:

• The ever-coquettish NCAA clearinghouse finally gave in Tuesday morning and coyly released 'will-he-or-won't-he' wide receiver Justin "Bones" Hunter to play this season.  He practiced with the Volunteers that very afternoon.
• Which I guess is good, as eternal optimist Chris Low of ESPN has decided that having talented young players may be kinda okay.
• Just in time for the new season UT's conversion of Neyland Stadium into the interior of the Death Star is complete. There are pictures. This is a good thing.

But wait, there's more! Today's football schedule! Quarterbacks! Geeks! Texans!

 All after the jump. Promise.

Yet More Headlines:

• The great Arian Foster has apparently foregone his dream of opening a philosophy store to secure the starting job for the Texans.
• All you Bray-ites, begin your weeping/teeth-gnashing/endless whining: Coach Dooley says Matt Simms is really, really, really the quarterback
• Colorful old person Mike Strange is concerned about the vols being 'geeked,' whatever that means
• Also, some guy hurt his leg

Today's Games of Interest (well, sorta):

• Minnesota at Middle Tennessee 6:30 p.m. ESPNU 
  Will MTSU's aspirations to win something called the Sun Belt (Which is like for wrestling, or something) be halted by the deadly Gophers?
• Southern Miss at South Carolina 6:30 ESPN
  Just for for the whiny Big 10 people: 'SEC! SEC! SEC!'
• 15) Pittsburgh at (24) Utah 8:30 Versus
  Should be the best game of the night, if you can figure out what the crap "Versus" is to actually watch the thing
• Complete List of Thursday's Games