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Tennessee Volunteers Vs. Oregon Ducks: Hail Mary Haiku

It's the Tennessee-Oregon Hail Mary Haiku for this abbreviated Game Week.

If you're new and have no idea what this is all about, you can catch up here.

Enter yours by clicking on the "Comments" link below, and pass the invitation to enter along to others. Heed the community guidelines, please, and remember, rec the entries you like, as the five or so entries with the most recs will be posted for voting on Thursday.

Hike! Oooh!

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No Flying V

Ain’t no Disney Flick
the Mighty Ducks won’t prevail
Rocky Top all day

You can take the boy out of Tennessee, but you can't take make him stop wearing Orange.

by kingofzachland on Sep 7, 2010 8:24 AM EDT reply actions  

Nice.

I guess dysentery would have taken up too many syllables.

Lou Brock loves Lamp.

by birdjam on Sep 7, 2010 8:45 AM EDT up reply actions  

Heh, yea the 5-7-5 will get ya

Oddly enough the 3 directions I pondered, Mighty Ducks, Duck Hunt & Oregon Trail are all featured in the first 3 haikus posted.

Bring it across, shape it down

by Getoffmyvols on Sep 7, 2010 8:49 AM EDT up reply actions  

My only regret

I couldn’t work Flying V in

You can take the boy out of Tennessee, but you can't take make him stop wearing Orange.

by kingofzachland on Sep 7, 2010 8:59 AM EDT up reply actions  

hope it’s like Duck Hunt
shootin’ ’em with the quickness
let Smokey go fetch

thanks to denial, i'm immortal

by thetennesseethumper on Sep 7, 2010 8:39 AM EDT reply actions   2 recs

nice

thanks to denial, i'm immortal

by thetennesseethumper on Sep 7, 2010 9:02 AM EDT up reply actions  

It’s not Orgeron.
Somebody tell my fingers
that it’s Oregon.

by Joel Hollingsworth on Sep 7, 2010 9:35 AM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Yellow, green, Nike
flap…Quack Attack? Wilcox’s D
gets sacks, Vols are back!

by VolnVA on Sep 7, 2010 10:08 AM EDT reply actions  

Can't decide whether the 's adds a syllable or not

Yellow, green, Nike
flap…Quack Attack? Wilcox D
gets sacks, Vols are back!

by VolnVA on Sep 7, 2010 10:10 AM EDT up reply actions  

Depends how you pronounce it.

I’d pronounce that Just Wil-cox Since I slurr the ‘s into the ’ckz’ sound the x makes. But if you enunciate it’s Wil-Cox-Es.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 12:21 AM EDT up reply actions  

first time

vols are the winners
roast duck is on the menu
we have coach wilcox

"GIVE HIM SIX" - John Ward

by volfan002 on Sep 7, 2010 10:33 AM EDT via mobile reply actions  

The Justin Wilcox Effect.

How do you spell “WIN”?
One-Hundred-And-Fifty-Two.
D-Line U! Balls Out.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 1:50 AM EDT up reply actions  

Rocky Top Belly Flop!

Speed Kills, LaMike thrills
Vols defense a leaking sieve
Scrubs by second half

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 11:07 AM EDT reply actions  

Let the Ducks beware.
If someone throws a cheap shot,
The Vols won’t fall down.

by ChattVol on Sep 7, 2010 11:58 AM EDT reply actions  

This ain’t UNM
Vols have a defense (we hope)
Scared of Wilcox yet?

by Incipient_Senescence on Sep 7, 2010 12:06 PM EDT reply actions  

It walks like a duck,
And quacks like a Mighty Duck;
Vol fans better duck?

(Naa….Vols win in a thriller, 31-28)

Ain't it good to be alive and be in Tennessee!

by ttocswob on Sep 7, 2010 12:09 PM EDT reply actions  

Duck is a delight
When seasoned, roasted just right
Hungry for a win

by UTK2004 on Sep 7, 2010 12:52 PM EDT reply actions   3 recs

For Incipient_Senescence

Ducks O-line in tact
Wilcox ain’t play’n in the game
not shaking in boots

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 12:56 PM EDT reply actions  

Right back atcha

Intact is one word
Ducks are not known for spelling
Or football. Go Vols!

by Incipient_Senescence on Sep 8, 2010 2:30 AM EDT up reply actions  

Do I need to? Yes.

At number seven
That ranking says otherwise
What’s the Vols ranking?

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:47 AM EDT up reply actions  

The Number is Nine.

As for Oregon, uhm, well..
They’re a long way down.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:05 AM EDT up reply actions  

Lemme try this again:

With a link.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:05 AM EDT up reply actions  

Not the all-time rank
Nine won’t help come Saturday
You can bank on that.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 3:16 AM EDT up reply actions  

Maybe Nine won’t help
But you know what surely will?
One-Hundred Thousand.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:19 AM EDT up reply actions  

One-Hundred Thousand?
That didn’t help Michigan.
They beat Florida.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 3:29 AM EDT up reply actions  

UM’s Hundred-K
Kinda Sorta, uhm, let’s see..
Putting it nice: Suck.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:37 AM EDT up reply actions  

You are correct sir
Just stating that UO has
Played in big venues.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 3:41 AM EDT up reply actions  

For UTK2004

You are what you eat
So enjoy that seasond fowl
Welcome to Duck side!

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 1:00 PM EDT reply actions  

Another cooked duck theme:

Chinese carryout?
Hawk with egg-roll was good, but
crispy duck sounds best.

by GMU Vol on Sep 7, 2010 1:23 PM EDT reply actions  

Good Luck to the Vols on your season

The Ducks will prevail
No injuries to either
S E C Rules – not!!

by Coastal Duck on Sep 7, 2010 1:24 PM EDT reply actions   2 recs

You are so right!

Too many weapons
Spread and speed will bewilder
Better luck next time

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 1:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thanks for playing,
but this is the SEC.
We invented speed.

;)

Bring it across, shape it down

by Getoffmyvols on Sep 7, 2010 2:20 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

He he he!

Nice retort my friend
It’s not who begins, but ends
Track town USA!

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

(Psst: it's Justin Hunter)

Been introduced to
an All-Vol: Tennessee’s new
Fresh Prince of the Track?

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 12:23 AM EDT up reply actions  

Interesting?

All hopes on Hunter
We shall see how that works out
But I’ll take LaMike

by Bubaduck on Sep 8, 2010 4:06 AM EDT up reply actions  

S E C made speed?
That’s just what your girlfriend said,
You’d better slow down.

Say what you mean, and say it mean. - Clint Ruin

by QuackinAK on Sep 7, 2010 8:19 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Let's have a good game!

Wilcox is good
Former Duck to boot
won’t suit up

by flyduckfly on Sep 7, 2010 2:23 PM EDT reply actions  

Love seeing all the Oregon fans weighing in on the HMH

Have we ever had this many opponent entries?

If y’all are coming to Knoxville this weekend, enjoy your trip. I hope you leave unhappy about the game but having otherwise had a great time.

Lou Brock loves Lamp.

by birdjam on Sep 7, 2010 2:25 PM EDT reply actions  

Would love to visit!

My brother’s a Vol
The banter has been awesome!
The game should be fun

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 2:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

Dooley started good
Those daffy ducks are coming
They’re dethhhhhhhhhhhpicable.

by danmarcel on Sep 7, 2010 2:28 PM EDT reply actions   3 recs

Let me try again (I thought Haiku was 3-5-3)

LaMichael James runs
spins, jukes, cuts, and breaks away
here is a hankie

by flyduckfly on Sep 7, 2010 2:32 PM EDT reply actions   2 recs

The Question Is:

Bif! Bam! Boom! Bam! Pow!
LaMichael hoped for punches.
Call it: Hadoyken!!!

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 12:28 AM EDT up reply actions  

Another one

Orange, white, together
A creamsicle fantasy
Prepare to get licked.

by flyduckfly on Sep 7, 2010 3:13 PM EDT reply actions   2 recs

LaMichael, Kenjon
Zone Option, Fly Sweep, End Around
Orange Nation Crying

"No one ever rises to low expectations." - Chip Kelly Head Coach at the Univ. of Oregon.

by SouthOfTheBorderDuck on Sep 7, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Whoo hooo!

My first rec ever on an SB blog (they don’t like me much at ATQ, apparently)!

"No one ever rises to low expectations." - Chip Kelly Head Coach at the Univ. of Oregon.

by SouthOfTheBorderDuck on Sep 7, 2010 7:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Humidity High
Ducks Depth Deep and Talented
OR Lots Tenn Little

"No one ever rises to low expectations." - Chip Kelly Head Coach at the Univ. of Oregon.

by SouthOfTheBorderDuck on Sep 7, 2010 3:51 PM EDT reply actions  

Fulmer to Kiffin
Champs to SEC Bottom
Dooley a Savior?

"No one ever rises to low expectations." - Chip Kelly Head Coach at the Univ. of Oregon.

by SouthOfTheBorderDuck on Sep 7, 2010 4:09 PM EDT reply actions  

The Ducks on the road
Minus thirteen and a half
Vegas has cursed us

axemen23: the human vuvuzela

by HoodRiverDuck on Sep 7, 2010 4:44 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

How witty and clever are you!
You must be a Duck through and through
So give a loud cheer
and dink a clod beer
but be nice to the Voluniers too!

by Bubaduck on Sep 7, 2010 6:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Volunteers?

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 12:29 AM EDT up reply actions  

Ahhh....Limericks now!

Oregon’s team speed’s unmatched
A team of Vols, they’ll dispatch!
Enjoy the game,
But forget the pain,
Theirs an SEC title to catch!

by Quackhead503 on Sep 7, 2010 8:40 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

And another

I came in peace, but some o’ you-uns couldn’t stand it – so-o-o

“There once was from Knoxville a lass . . .”

(I believe everyone knows that one, heh, heh, heh.)

by Coastal Duck on Sep 7, 2010 11:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

Haiku

Duck Will Deliver
To Vol Fans by Halftime
A Pining for Kiffin

by DucksOne on Sep 7, 2010 5:20 PM EDT reply actions  

hmm...

Im a duck fan… derp!
The Oregon Ducks rule… derp!
Volunteers are stupidheads… derp!

by Caban on Sep 7, 2010 7:05 PM EDT reply actions  

in the same vein...

one two three four five
one two three four five six… crap!
one two three four five

by Caban on Sep 7, 2010 7:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

Autzen it is not
Neyland and a sea of orange
Witness big upset

Ahhhhhh, hey what about my cheering?!! Ahhhhhhhh - Swiperboy

by RockyTopinKY on Sep 7, 2010 7:50 PM EDT reply actions  

I don’t know the words
to Rocky Top but know all
Mighty Oregon

ATQ's #1 Bill Musgrave, benzduck and Matt Daddy fan

by daisyduck on Sep 7, 2010 7:58 PM EDT reply actions  

If you want to win
Tennessee better slow down
Or the O will out run you

Say what you mean, and say it mean. - Clint Ruin

by QuackinAK on Sep 7, 2010 8:30 PM EDT reply actions  

I like the rhyming ones better.

LaMichael jukes right
Checkered end zone in his sight
This is the Ducks night

by Quackhead503 on Sep 7, 2010 8:34 PM EDT reply actions  

How about this?

Neyland crowd will sit
As the UT D gets ripped.
Forty-two to zip.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 7, 2010 8:49 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Now....

If only I could transfer my haiku-making skills over to the Oregon jersey pick-em game….I’d be set…

by Quackhead503 on Sep 7, 2010 11:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

just kidding, really

ducks swim on river
pass ’neath the Henley St. Bridge
out comes bunch o trolls

thanks to denial, i'm immortal

by thetennesseethumper on Sep 7, 2010 9:43 PM EDT reply actions   2 recs

No! Trolls we are not
new friends from the left coast we’re
sorry to beat you

ATQ's #1 Bill Musgrave, benzduck and Matt Daddy fan

by daisyduck on Sep 7, 2010 9:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

We’ll claim victory
If one Vol fan learns to say
ORE-Y-GUN, DAMNIT.

axemen23: the human vuvuzela

by HoodRiverDuck on Sep 7, 2010 10:23 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Bright checkered endzones
Look so much nicer thus when
LaMike steps within

by Speedy-O on Sep 7, 2010 10:27 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Yes, “Rocky Top” is
Annoying; but Duck fans know
“Conquest” is far worse.

Tennessee 12th man?
Six digit screaming fan base?
You ain’t playing Cal.

Volunteers and Ducks
have a great deal in common.
Where is that Bryce Brown?

There is one thing that
we thank you for passing on..
Onterrio Smith.

Average Score Since 2004: Oregon 42 Washington 17

by benzduck on Sep 8, 2010 12:10 AM EDT reply actions   3 recs

Rec'd

Just for this one stanza:

Volunteers and Ducks
have a great deal in common.
Where is that Bryce Brown?

axemen23: the human vuvuzela

by HoodRiverDuck on Sep 8, 2010 12:25 AM EDT up reply actions  

.

So many Ducks out
Because they only now know
What a Haiku is.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 12:32 AM EDT reply actions   1 recs

UT fans decide
To write haiku’s cuz they are
The easiest poems.

Us Oregon fans
Write limericks around your
Silly lil’ haiku’s.

There once was a DE named Rowe
And superior talent he showed!
The UT line tried to block,
Rowe leaped the chop,
And smashed Matt Simms to the flo’! (That’s ebonics for floor….)

Nah…this is actually a fun little concept. I do like the limericks better. More substance. Perhaps us Duck fans are just great poets?

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 12:52 AM EDT up reply actions  

Limricks, eh?

There once was a fan in Eugene
Who was new to the poetry Scene
Imagine the Scandal
When he heard from this Vandal
That Limricks are more suited for Teens.

… But no, really, Limricks are very, very low on the “Poetry” ladder because they follow very little actual form, other than the traditional aabba rhyme sceme, and are centered around nonsensical things. The reason the “There was an old man in Peru…” Limrick is so famous is because it epitomizes Limricks in general: nonsensical things that hold maybe the slightest hint of a real application within them.They are mostly good for sounding good. Just wait until we might have to do the Second Overtime Sonnet ;-)

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 1:37 AM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Well then..

I was just being facetious…thanks for the poetry lesson though. Get it from wikipedia?
I guess we’ll go back to haiku’s then…

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:00 AM EDT up reply actions  

Nah

I’m fairly big into poetry, I’ll admit. And it’s hard to tell facet..ism?… via the internet, of course.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 2:03 AM EDT up reply actions  

Touche..

my man. Indeed it is. I’m only fairly big into football. I do haiku’s in my off-hours.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:05 AM EDT up reply actions  

Poor artist blames form
The light from within is born
Who cares…Ducks Stomp Vols!

by Bubaduck on Sep 8, 2010 2:32 AM EDT up reply actions  

Cross a Vol and Beav?
Get a flimsy orange dam
Just like your defense

Thanks for letting us join in the fun!

Defending maligned chants since 2009

by Gorbachav5 on Sep 8, 2010 12:54 AM EDT reply actions   1 recs

1am, all Vols abed
Ducks run amok on Rocky Top Talk
Just 10pm here

ATQ's #1 Bill Musgrave, benzduck and Matt Daddy fan

by daisyduck on Sep 8, 2010 1:04 AM EDT reply actions   1 recs

7-9-5?

Typical west coast liberal…

Average Score Since 2004: Oregon 42 Washington 17

by benzduck on Sep 8, 2010 1:22 AM EDT up reply actions  

Look

Rules are made to be broken. Or constitutionally amended. Or supported by more of your tax dollars. Legalize Marijuana!!!

ATQ's #1 Bill Musgrave, benzduck and Matt Daddy fan

by daisyduck on Sep 8, 2010 1:50 AM EDT up reply actions  

Onterrio Smith likes the way you think.

Just to bring everything back on topic.

Average Score Since 2004: Oregon 42 Washington 17

by benzduck on Sep 8, 2010 2:01 AM EDT up reply actions  

Mighty Oregon (the blue version)

Oregon our alma mater, where the men of steel are found; in the bushes with the coeds, making love upon the ground.
This goes on ‘til early morning, when the cops break up the fun; There’ll be a military wedding, for the sons of Oregon!

Go Ducks! WTD!

by autzencitylimits on Sep 8, 2010 1:23 AM EDT reply actions  

Overabundance
Incompatibility
Refrigerators

it’s spelled "S-H-U-F-E-L-T-A-L-L-W-A-R-M-A-N-D-F-U-Z-Z-Y"

by JShufelt on Sep 8, 2010 1:23 AM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Haikus are easy

But sometimes they don’t make sense.
…. ;-)

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 1:30 AM EDT up reply actions  

Ah!

SO MANY RULES!

it’s spelled "S-H-U-F-E-L-T-A-L-L-W-A-R-M-A-N-D-F-U-Z-Z-Y"

by JShufelt on Sep 8, 2010 1:34 AM EDT up reply actions  

Haiku the Day

“So many Ducks out
Because they only now know
What a Haiku is.” by bobothevol

I won’t bet point spread, but I’ll wager that there are more Japanese students at Oregon (located on the Pacific Rim) than there are at Tennessee. Heck, Oregon’s Knight Library has a whole section devoted to Asian literature, but thanks for playing.

In politics we’re left and right
for football we’re all over the field
after our win on rocky top we’ll drink beer with everyone

Not exactly Haikuish, but you get my drift!

Go Ducks! WTD!

by autzencitylimits on Sep 8, 2010 1:35 AM EDT reply actions  

Shoot

Appalachian State has a section in their library dedicated for Asian Literature. I’d certainly hope there’s many more Asian-decent students or Foriegn Students from Asian in Oregon, geography being what it is. I’m sure a place on the Gulf has many more Mexican students that Tennessee, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make a “They seem to have discovered the art of corn tortillas” joke when they jump to the first mention of Tacos.

And that last bit is a RTT/SEC-BB joke, I don’t expect you to understand. But Tacos teach us all a very valuable lesson.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 1:42 AM EDT up reply actions  

Don’t like the tacos?
Eat some enroute to Neyland
hopefully you’ll choke

Say what you mean, and say it mean. - Clint Ruin

by QuackinAK on Sep 8, 2010 1:58 AM EDT up reply actions  

Whomever made you think

That we don’t like the tacos.
Doesn’t know their joy.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 2:06 AM EDT up reply actions  

Taco lessons?

Only thing tacos have taught me is to keep a toilet within running range. I’ll never visit a taco cart in Portland again…

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:10 AM EDT up reply actions  

Alabama Recap.

Or “Screw This, Let’s Go Eat Mexican. Wait, What Happened?”

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 2:38 AM EDT up reply actions  

To the Oregon Fans around here, though:

Please do try to keep the comments PG-13 or less. We tend to try to, and it’ll certainly earn you a lot of goodwill around these parts. You guys aren’t the first to try to hijack a Haiku-thread, nor will you be the last, and we take it in fairly good stride. If you want to cuss throw a [FULMERIZED] in there instead, and try not to be too open with the innuendos.

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 1:44 AM EDT reply actions  

Reed the posts in full
You’ll find that Ducks are quite cool
Vols can be crass too

by Bubaduck on Sep 8, 2010 2:39 AM EDT up reply actions  

Some sure walked the line

But I know you mean good taste.
Just a reminder. ;-)

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 2:46 AM EDT up reply actions  

Hey now..

It was my first try
Poetry not my strong suit
Hard to find a rhyme.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:48 AM EDT up reply actions  

It's okay:

Thing about Haikus:
They don’t need to rhyme at all.
Gerk Erk Derp Flerp Zerp!

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:09 AM EDT up reply actions  

This I know.

There’s just a strange sense of fulfillment I get when I’m able to rhyme a Haiku three times in 17 syllables.

And there was no way I was going to Haiku that.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 3:13 AM EDT up reply actions  

It’s my Haiku dream
To have one flow like a stream
And sublime as steam.

Or something?

______________________________________________
I will give my North Carolina for Tennessee Today. Apparently.

by bobothevol on Sep 8, 2010 3:21 AM EDT up reply actions  

Close. You captured the essence.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 3:28 AM EDT up reply actions  

I I know your hear rends
At Neyland they’ll fight to the end
But let us be friends

by Bubaduck on Sep 8, 2010 2:51 AM EDT up reply actions  

Okay...last one.

Hey lets not be crass
About a lil’ word like a#&
It’s all in the past.

by Quackhead503 on Sep 8, 2010 2:52 AM EDT up reply actions  

808 duck here vs Tennessee

a haiku

J M is a Reb
18 duck starters return
You lose once? NO TWICE.

by sheyn on Sep 9, 2010 12:10 PM EDT reply actions  

Great thread

Glad to see you guys
Have a good sense of humor
Oklahoma sucks

Go Ducks!

I'm so glad the Cheat is not dead

by GustyJ on Sep 9, 2010 6:38 PM EDT reply actions  

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