Tennessee Volunteer national statistical rankings after Week 10

Jim Brown-US PRESSWIRE

Did you know that having "an albatross around your neck" was the original punishment for the guy who killed the big flying bird? Why am I telling you this? No reason.

Caveats.

Well, just how good was the offense this weekend? And just how bad was the defense? The answer is very, very, very. The more you type that word, the weirder it looks. Very weirder. Very, very, very.

Here are the latest NCAA statistical rankings for the Vols after the Extreme Bowl (co-sponsored by the new Red Bull Exponential and Ken's Disaster Restoration Services), grouped into three categories: Those things in which UT is in the Top 30, those things in which UT is in the Bottom 30, and everything else. First up, the Stuff UT Is Doing Well.

Categories In Which Tennessee
Is In The Top Quartile
Category

2011

NCS GS FL AK GA MSB AL SC TR MO VAN KY
Pass Sacks Allowed 40 29 14 13 7 4 3 2 3 2
Tackles for Loss Allowed 38 97 55 57 55 58 26 14 6 3
Passing Offense 50 13 9 14 8 14 22 28 21 12
Total Offense 104 23 15 30 17 18 22 34 29 18
Scoring Offense 106 43 15 37 23 22 24 37 30 24
Red Zone Efficiency 58 65 57 43 24 22 14 19 25 26
Kickoff Return Yardage Defense 7 76 63 64 53 33 30 28 33 27
First Downs 98 40 30 44 18 21 25 41 39 27
Passes Intercepted 86 1 3 11 2 2 18 24 26 30
Passing Efficiency 69 32 8 35 24 39 39 49 39 30

Dropped out: Fewest Yards Penalized Per Game
Returns: Kickoff Return Yardage Defense, First Downs, Passing Efficiency.

Woo the green. Lovely green. ALL OUR BACKFRIELD BELONG TO USZ. News flash: UT can pass, and they are quite happy to do it. Ten categories in the Top 30, almost all offensive and almost all passing-oriented. Forget the defense for a moment and do a happy dance.

#OPPORTUNITYISNOWHERE

Finished? Okay, now sit down. I mean it. Sit. Down.

The chart below looks like we got shot in Week 2 and can't stop the bleeding. We got shot again in Week 6, and in Week 7 Alabama unholstered the automatic. Now some guy named Troy comes along, and Troy is not a Good Samaritan. No, he's like the polar opposite of a Good Samaritan. He's like . . . Bad Opposite Samaritan Guy, and he's not stopping and helping. He's stopping and ripping off the bandages and sticking his grubby little fingers all down in our wounds and stuff. Not a nice man.

It's bad, is what I'm saying. Red Zone Efficiency Defense last in the nation, tied with Hawaii. Almost as bad is Pass Defense and Total Defense, hanging out with the likes of Idaho, Louisiana-Lafayette, Tulane, and Eastern Michigan. A Scoring Defense nestled snugly between Army and UAB.

And that doesn't even get us to Pass Sacks and Defense Fourth-down Efficiency. And look who's at the door! It's First Downs Allowed, Pass Efficiency Defense, and Rushing Defense! Party in the cellar!

Sigh.

Categories In Which Tennessee
Is In The Bottom Quartile
Category

2011

NCS GS FL AK GA MSB AL SC TR MO VAN KY
Rushing Defense 69 46 36 84 74 92 81 89 85 90
Pass Efficiency Defense 48 28 13 29 17 30 39 66 87 91
First Downs Allowed 18 71 79 77 70 62 72 75 79 95
Defense Fourth-down Efficiency 48 37 76 82 88 85 97 102 103 95
Pass Sacks 100 68 47 83 94 100 95 91 86 97
Fumbles Recovered 71 66 60 79 97 70 93 86 97 104
Scoring Defense 36 54 38 64 61 81 90 96 101 107
Total Defense 28 70 48 77 68 79 87 95 99 112
Time of Possession 37 38 81 87 83 63 82 94 106 112
Pass Defense 12 86 73 66 66 74 84 92 103 115
Red Zone Efficiency - Defense 47 58 95 108 104 110 116 117 118 119

New Arrivals: Rushing Defense, Pass Efficiency Defense, First Downs Allowed, Pass Sacks.
Climbed out: Passes Had Intercepted.

Bonus Wikipedia Excerpt Concerning Albatrosses, Among the Largest of Flying Birds:

An albatross is a central emblem in The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge; a captive albatross is also a metaphor for the poète maudit in a poem of Charles Baudelaire. It is from the Coleridge poem that the usage of albatross as a metaphor is derived; someone with a burden or obstacle is said to have 'an albatross around their neck', the punishment given in the poem to the mariner who killed the albatross.

(Emphasis added.) Make of that what you will.

THE BIG FAT MIDDLE

And here's the rest, for tracking purposes.

Categories In Which Tennessee
Is In The Middle
Category

2011

NCS GS FL AK GA MSB AL SC TR MO VAN KY
Fewest Yards Penalized Per Game 51 39 53 59 42 39 40 26 26 42
Fumbles Lost 6 43 59 40 47 49 49 51 40 48
Defense Third-down Efficiency 57 57 27 18 17 28 14 29 31 49
Offense Fourth-down Efficiency 91 58 54 38 76 74 77 100 58 55
Offense Third-down Efficiency 56 43 49 63 67 54 49 63 59 60
Kickoff Returns 41 38 14 23 55 65 49 52 57 61
Tackles for Loss 67 65 53 62 81 74 69 84 71 61
Rushing Offense 116 45 42 71 57 49 45 57 68 62
Fewest Penalties Per Game 56 52 53 75 69 71 66 45 45 65
Turnovers Gained 91 3 7 28 20 11 39 48 59 72
Turnovers Lost 20 23 51 55 69 94 85 93 82 75
Punt Returns 61 59 51 54 38 41 47 48 63 76
Punt Return Yardage Defense 85 5 8 26 29 20 20 73 81 81
Net Punting 104 32 56 42 46 60 73 75 84 83
Turnover Margin 59 4 18 48 41 55 69 80 80 85
Passes Had Intercepted 63 1 28 78 76 100 92 101 103 89

Players in the Top 30

Player Stat 2011 NCS GS FL AK GA MSB AL SC TR MO VAN KY
Cordarrelle Patterson Kickoff Returns - - 5 15 16 22 2 2 4 8
A.J. Johnson Total Tackles - - - - - - 11 7 5 6
Tyler Bray Passing Yards Per Game - 10 11 13 9 14 16 20 16 9
Tyler Bray Total Passing Yards - 10 7 9 9 8 24 23 18 9
Byron Moore Interceptions - 5 - - 6 5 4 6 7 12
Tyler Bray Total Offense - 17 20 21 14 23 28 36 28 14
Justin Hunter Total Receiving Yards - - 11 12 5 17 47 37 37 16
Justin Hunter Receiving Yards Per Game - - 14 18 13 26 41 31 34 17
Tyler Bray Points Responsible For - - 12 22 10 16 19 32 24 20
Cordarrelle Patterson All-Purpose Running - - 8 23 - - 28 29 36 24
Tyler Bray Passing - 16 - 27 22 24 28 32 29 24
Tyler Bray Passing Efficiency - 30 5 28 22 35 35 49 36 30
FORMERLY IN THE TOP 30
Justin Hunter Receptions Per Game - 9 14 19 13 25 47 45 43 33
Curt Maggitt Forced Fumbles - 6 - - - - 27 28 43
Curt Maggitt Forced Fumbles - - - - - 21 -
Derrick Brodus Field Goals - - - - 18 23 -
Brian Randolph Solo Tackles - - 13 - 29 - -
Cordarrelle Patterson Total Receiving Yards - - 30 - - - -
Willie Bohannon Fumbles Recovered - - 17 - - - -
Eric Gordon Interceptions - 5 - - - - -
Prentiss Waggner Interceptions - 5 - - - - -
Marsalis Teague Interceptions - 5 - - - - -
Maurice Couch Forced Fumbles - 6 - - - - -
Byron Moore Solo Tackles - 11 - - - - -
Michael Palardy Field Goals - 13 - - - - -
Curt Maggitt Pass Sacks - 20 - - - - -
Cordarrelle Patterson Scoring - 25 - - - - -
Devrin Young Kickoff Returns - 30 - - - - -
2011
Austin Johnson Interceptions 23
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