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College Football RPGs

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As one of a handful of certifiable old farts in the sports blogging niche, I can actually remember when Pong was released upon the world. Yes, I spent literally months using a rectangle to bat a square back and forth with friends because YOU COULD PLAY GAMES ON YOUR TV, MAN! (Incidentally, I also remember TV remote controls you had to attach with a cord.)

Even back then, the innovation curve was steep, and I quickly graduated on to Breakout (a rectangle on the bottom and a group of blocks on the top that DISAPPEARED WHEN YOU HIT THEM WOO) and then on to what may have been the first role playing game ever developed: Zork, in which I found myself standing in an open field west of a white house with a boarded front door next to a small mailbox, which, of course, I opened by typing "examine mailbox." I'm almost certain that I spent an entire summer likely to be eaten by a grue. Then came Lord Dimwit Flathead the Excessive and his royal family and on and on and on until somewhere around Final Fantasy VI or so, when I finally stopped playing RPGs. Sad face.

So I may have 15 years' worth of rust to shake off, but I can certainly appreciate a good RPG meme when I see it, and that's exactly what the RTT community birthed out of the ashes of the Tennessee-Georgia game. Here's a compilation of some of what transpired last Saturday in the midst of the beat down, and I'll ask y'all to devote your day to coming up with some more. Away we go.

Indiana. Lvl 2
Strong vs Michigan
Weak vs Ohio.

by bobothevol

Tennessee. Lvl 10
Strong vs Tradition
Special rules: When you are Tennessee you double your heart but half your party becomes incapacitated.

by bobothevol

Georgia Lvl 10
Strong vs members of the Sun Belt Class
Special rule: When fighting Florida, all attacks take a -3 penalty to hit.

by Caban

South Carolina. Lvl 8
Strong vs Everyone.
Special Rule: Weak in months that end with ber.

by bobothevol

Les Miles uses confusion!

It’s super effective!

by Big Orange Screw

LSU Level 8
Strong vs. Chaos
Special Rules: Les Miles always gets a 1d20 saving throw, which has a +18 modifier.

by darthbubba

Florida. Level 15
Strong vs Orange.
Weak vs Red, Snap Damage.

by bobothevol

Florida. Level 15
Strong vs Orange & White (5), Red & Black (15).
Weak vs Red Crimson, Snap Damage.
Special Rules: -5 on all offensive saving throws, due to Addazio and Pouncey.

by darthbubba

Precious Hair. Level 99
Nickname: The God Killer
Strong vs World
Special Rules: Boom.

by bobothevol

So that's what we had in the game thread Saturday. What have you for today? There are a few potential subjects to riff on below the jump.

  • Lane Kiffin
  • Ed Orgeron
  • Monte Kiffin
  • Steve Spurrier
  • Phillip Fulmer
  • Oregon
  • Alabama
  • Ohio State
  • The Big Ten
  • The SEC
  • The Pac-10
  • ESPN
  • College football
  • Stewart Mandel
  • Spencer Hall
  • Brian Cook
  • Bleacher Report
  • SB Nation
  • You get the idea

So whatcha got?