SBN College Gets Entertaining This Monday Morning

• Upon learning of the news that a Columbus AAU basketball team may have jeopardized the eligibility of two Georgia players, Dawg Sports delivers what may be the rant of the year:

First of all, when is the last time you heard an AAU program mentioned in any context that wasn’t sleazy? At best, AAU programs surface in media reports in ways that make the reader feel slightly dirty, producing squirms of discomfort regarding the thin grime of implicit impropriety that appears to coat everything about the enterprise . . . . Also, the Parks and Rec Department, for crying out loud? Has proximity to Auburn caused Columbus to be poisoned by the steady seepage of unethical conduct from the (morally) Ugliest Village? Were it not for the fact that the Lowell of the South produced both Henry Benning and Doug Gillett, I’d be ready to let East Alabama annex the Fountain City.

And that's just for starters.  Dawg Sports does say that it's too soon to panic, but also suggests that "practicing panicking so you’ll be ready when the time comes wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world."

• Addicted to Quack draws on A Few Good Men for a parody of the ages, starring Chip Kelly as Colonel Nathan Jessup.
• A Sea of Blue says that John Calipari's two-year contract extension may make it more expensive for NBA teams to poach Kentucky's coach, but doesn't foreclose the possibility altogether.
• Burnt Orange Nation uses something called the "simple rating system" to identify that top basketball programs of the past decade.