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Rocky Top Locks, Week 9

Brought to you by the letter U, as in "underperforming."

The spirit animal of the Week 9 Locks Word of the Week.
The spirit animal of the Week 9 Locks Word of the Week.
Joel Auerbach

This opener brought to you by it was late, I was tired, and the picks season is just kind of average in all directions.

Chris: 6-0 this week, 26-21-1 overall

I_S: 1-5 this week, 24-24 overall

KidB: 2-4 this week, 22-24-2 overall

Chris's "2013 Was So Last Year" Picks

Virginia Tech (+3) vs. Miami (FL) - Yeah, not even a week after I make fun of kid for taking Frank Beamer in a Thursday night game, I do the same. The differences: it's a home game, Virginia Tech is a home dog, and I've already written the snark if I miss this game and someone else wins the week.

Maryland (+11) @ Wisconsin - I don't know when I got on the "let's bet on Maryland" bandwagon, but this line seems based on everyone ignoring Wisconsin and not noticing they have zero passing game. Remember this when Maryland has 25 yards of offense.

Missouri (-20.5) vs. Vanderbilt - This also serves as Maty Mauk's over/under for passing yards on the game, but I could also see Mauk going something like 20-38 for 253 yards and 5 TDs, because nothing he ever does makes sense. Also, 21-0 is a cover.

Ole Miss (-3.5) @ LSU - are we sure a) what LSU does well and b) why they're ranked? Or are we giving them credit for barely beating Florida and housing a Kentucky team we're still not sure about? (To Mississippi State fans: sorry in advance for that next-level jinx.)

South Carolina @ Auburn OVER 65. So it's come to this: betting SEC overs in evening games because I don't trust anything else this week.

Utah (+1) vs. USC - It's Sarktober!

KidB's "Free Money" Picks

Oregon-17.5 over CAL: If gambling were legal, would you spend your winnings on pudding?

UAB+26.5 over ARKANSAS: Vegas ain't heard about my boy Billy Clark.

Alabama-17.5 over TENNESSEE: Tennessee won't score.

Georgia Tech+3 over PITT: The system travels.

Louisiana Tech-9.5 over SOUTHERN MISSISSIPPI: "Southern Miss is pretty good at football," said no one, ever.

UTAH STATE-17 over University of Nevada Las Vegas:  No Chuckie, no problem.

I_S's "Playing For the Tiebreaker Like Milos Raonic" Picks

Texas +10 over KANSAS STATE. BYU game aside, Texas has been pretty feisty this year. (Yes, it is weird to use "feisty" to describe a team like Texas, but they are a double-digit dog). Things are always a bit uneven in the first year under a new coach, but they had an off game last week, and Kansas State had a good game. Things steady out this week, and this one should be close.

Minnesota -6.5 over ILLINOIS. I typically dislike teams in unfamiliar roles, but Illinois is just terrible, and Minnesota had their wake-up call last week and has nothing to look ahead to.

NIU/EMU under 61. Eastern Michigan can't score (except against Buffalo for some reason). And Northern Illinois hasn't exactly been blowing people's doors off, shootout against Hipster Miami notwithstanding. I'm seeing 45-7 or 41-10 here, with 21-10 a whole lot more likely than 38-28.

KENTUCKY +14 over Mississippi State. This pick could get real ugly real fast, because this line is a little short for the #1 team in the nation visiting a Kentucky team that got housed last week (compare: UT/Bama line). But I like fading teams in unfamiliar roles, and Mississippi State hasn't had to deal with being the team that gets everyone's best shot.

UNC +7 over VIRGINIA. When in doubt, bet on the 4-4 Coastal.

Georgia Tech +3 over PITT. When in doubt, bet on the 4-4 Coastal.